Trolls Eat Children
by Backroads
Summary: Hiccup goes hunting for trolls. And finds one.


_I was feeling cutesy._

* * *

Hiccup knew he was going to get into trouble. He knew it even as he left the shore with the claim that he had to go "really bad". His dad knew everything that went on in Berk, the entire island, and Hiccup was already wondering how long he would be grounded and what extra chores he would have to do.

But he just couldn't help it. The woods were there, so close to the shoreline, so tempting. And even though his dad didn't want Gobber "filling the boy's head with enough troll stories to give him nightmares" Hiccup had yet to have a troll dream that was truly scary.

He gripped the knife he had stolen from the blacksmith shop. It was a very small knife, but then again Hiccup was a very small six-year-old. The knife was the perfect size. He figured a very small boy wouldn't be noticed by a big scary troll.

Troll hunting. So much more exciting than boring old fishing. Anyone could fish. Hiccup knew perfectly well how to fish. Everyone knew perfectly well how to fish. Half the food in Berk was fish.

Now troll hunting, that was new.

Fishlegs and Tuffnut had insisted he couldn't catch one. Tuffnut had said trolls would eat him. That had upset Ruffnut to tears, though Astrid had wound up beating Tuffnut up for that. Snotlout just said there were no such things as trolls.

Hiccup would show them all.

And if he brought back a troll's head, maybe his dad wouldn't be too mad and he wouldn't get into too much trouble.

Though he knew he wasn't supposed to be in the woods by himself. But he was a Viking!

The sun was already setting. The trolls would be out. He became all tingly just thinking about it. His grip tightened on the knife and continued into the trees. In the distance he could hear his father calling for him.

Something very large moved up ahead, and Hiccup bit back a scream. Trolls could smell fear. They could even hear fear. Which obviously meant no screaming.

Unless it wasn't a troll. Maybe his dad and Snotlout were right and there were no such things as trolls. Which meant it was a bear or a shark or a dragon or a really big sheep that had gotten lost. If it wasn't a troll, he hoped it was the sheep.

The very large thing up stopped.

This was it. Hiccup took a deep breath, held out the knife, and ran forward with the greatest Viking yell he could muster. His knife blade plunged into something. He had made contact!

"What is this?"

The knife hadn't done much of anything. Maybe he had run into a rock. A soft rock.

But then something plucked him up by the back of the shirt. His knife clattered to the earth as he found himself staring into a pair of bright yellow eyes. It was a claw that had picked him up. A really large claw that belonged to a troll.

For a moment he was too impressed by the situation to be afraid.

"A little human," the troll said in a raspy voice. Its breath was terrible. Stinky, even worse than that one warrior who never bathed. Hiccup tried not to breathe. "I thought all little humans were inside by now. Don't they know that trolls eat little humans?"

The moment without fear ended. Hiccup actually considered crying; indeed, the tears were in his eyes and the wail was in his throat. But he was a Viking and Vikings didn't cry. Even when they were being held up in the air by trolls the sizes of houses with big round eyes and giant ears and lots of sharp green teeth.

"I'm hunting trolls!" Hiccup declared, swinging a fist.

The troll sighed and rolled its large eyes. "Troll hunting. When will they ever learn?"

"I stabbed you!"

"A scrape on my foot, little human."

"I'm going to capture you anyway! I'll take you back home and use one of my dad's swords to chop off your ugly head!"

But instead of showing the fear Hiccup felt the troll should be feeling after such a mighty threat, the troll just laughed. "I think I would have to put you down first."

Hiccup had the distinct impression the troll was making fun of him. Hiccup was always being made fun of, and a troll doing it was even worse. "Then put me down!"

"All right." The troll set him down.

Hiccup picked up his knife and pointed it up at the troll's face, which was nearly hidden in the trees. "Let's go! March!" He tried to sound as threatening as he could. "Or I'll stab you again!"

"You'll need a bigger sword. Much bigger."

"I'll get one later!"

The troll sighed, then sat down with surprisingly silence. "And why do you want to hunt a troll?"

"Because I told my friends I could."

"Oh. Of course. And why would you tell them that?"

Hiccup didn't like these questions. "So they would think I was brave."

"Well," said the troll, "I think you're very brave. Coming out here all alone in the dark. How many of your friends would do that?"

Hiccup thought hard. "None of them. Snotlout's even afraid of the normal dark inside. But I'm not supposed to say that."

"See? You're already off to a very brave start."

"I am?"

"Yes. You said you would do something and here you are. Now why else do you want to capture me?"

"You said you eat children." Hiccup lowered the knife.

"No. I was just saying that to scare you. Though it does keep children from bothering me. Most of the time. You're the first I've heard of in quite a while."

"You really don't eat children?"

"That's disgusting. Why would we eat children? They're small and bony."

Hiccup paused, not sure how to respond.

"Who do you know who was actually eaten by a troll?"

There had to be someone! But no names came to mind. "No one."

"There you go."

"But what about socks? Don't you steal socks?"

The troll laughed. "What would I do with socks?"

Hiccup felt himself distrusting Gobber more and more every second. "What's your name?"

"Sindri," replied the troll.

Hiccup laughed. "That's a funny name for a troll."

"Well, what's your name?" asked Sindri.

"Hiccup."

"That's an even funnier name."

"No, it's not!"

"It is, too." Sindri the troll stood up. "Are you hungry, Hiccup? It's time for my breakfast. I promise it isn't children."

Hiccup was hungry. They were supposed to eat after the fishing trip. "Yes."

"Then come on."

Hiccup wondered if this were a trick, but Sindri seemed nice enough.

Sindri lived in a very nice cave that was clean and even had a broom made of half a small fir tree. The table was too high for Hiccup, but Sindri let him sit on it. Breakfast/dinner was venison, which Sindri ate raw and Hiccup had cooked. It was quite tasty.

"You're a good cook," said Hiccup, remembering his manners.

"Thank-you."

But there was still one problem. Hiccup had come out here to hunt a troll. "What am I going to tell everyone when I go back and I have no troll?"

Sindri thought hard. "Well, you could tell them the truth, but I do have a reputation to protect and the truth would just be boring."

Hiccup nodded in agreement.

"Tell you what," said Sindri. "Since I have no intention of going back to the village with, why don't I give you something? I have some old teeth lying around. Take one of those back and say you ripped it right from my mouth to stop me from eating you."

"Wow! That would be perfect!"

"No problem at all." Sindri stood up from the table and rummaged through a box before pulling out an old tooth. It was even chipped.

Hiccup awkwardly took it, though it was half as big as he was.

"Make sure you tell everyone how scary I am," said Sindri.

"I will! Thanks! But I need to get back before I get in any more trouble."

"Of course. Thanks for visiting and not hunting me down."

"Bye!" said Hiccup as he left the cave.

Unfortunately, it was very dark by the time he left the cave. It wasn't too hard to find the right path, but even so Hiccup stumbled along under the weight of the tooth. And he hoped he was on the right path. He was sort of sure it was the right path. At least he knew no troll would eat him.

He found himself trudging up a hill. He didn't remember any hill. For the second time that night he felt afraid. It was cloudy and there were no stars and he couldn't see much of anything. He thought about going back to Sindri's cave, but he didn't remember the way back.

Half-way up the hill he tripped. He himself only rolled a short way down, but the troll teeth flew from his grasp.

No. Not his proof. Not his cool story.

He ran the rest way of the way down the hill. It was too dark to see the tooth, and it could have easily rolled into the bushes. He searched and searched, but found nothing but spiders and a badger that tried to bite him.

It wasn't fair.

All he had wanted to do was kill a troll. Now he was lost in the dark and scared and cold and didn't even have his troll tooth. He couldn't help but cry.

"Hiccup?"

His head jerked up at the sound of his dad's voice. "Daddy?"

The word was barely out of his mouth before his father scooped him up. "Where were you? I was worried sick! You know better than to wander off in the woods! Half the village is looking for you."

Now Hiccup felt bad, on top of everything else. "I'm sorry."

"You had better be. You're grounded."

He had expected that. But he had also expected something to show for it.

"What were you doing out here?"

No point in lying anymore. "Hunting trolls."

His father paused, face very stern and very angry. "Hunting trolls? What?"

Hiccup nodded. "And I found one and he was nice and he even gave me one of his teeth but I fell and I lost it and—"

His father sighed. "Stop. I don't want to hear it. We're going home and then you're going right to bed."

"But—"

"Hiccup, no. And I'll be telling Gobber to stop telling you these crazy stories. I don't want you telling them, either."

"But it was real! I did find a troll!"

His father ignored him, just set off towards the village.

Hiccup never did find the tooth. Nor did he ever see Sindri or any other troll again. And as the years passed he decided it had just been a dream.

Maybe.

_**The End!**_


End file.
